“The formula simply makes you more of what you already are.” (Swamp Thing)

In her May 5 review of Captain America: Civil War, science fiction essayist and reviewer Abigail Nussbaum writes that “any fictional world that houses more than a handful of (superheroes) will inevitably devolve into a horrifying dystopia in which the rule of law and the authority of democratic government are meaningless.”

No. Do not tell me what themes to stuff into my writing. I will not turn Super Holly’s action-comedy universe into another done-to-death dystopia. It’s not power that corrupts, it’s the love of power. In my novel (yeah, yeah, I’m still working on it), superpower does not corrupt, it makes people more of what they already are. In Super Holly’s graphic novel, The Last Super, she covers the super-dictatorship thing: those who want power most handle it worst.

No! I hate the “power corrupts, and absolute power blah blah blah” cliche, it is a cop out that lets bad behavior off the hook. Do not tell me that I’d be Donald Trump too if money and power got dumped on me, it insults my intelligence AND my morality!

NO! Abigail, my stories are MINE, they have happy endings, my superheroes are people too (and by the way, you know they’re not real, right?), and I AM NOT GOING TO PLAY YOUR WAY!

lucy not play your way

Gimme a girl fight!

Marvel WomenI saw Batman V Superman, and I repeat to its director: BATMAN AIN’T DUMB! The movie is grim and sad and darkly dark except for the desert scene shot in eyeball-scorching sunlight. The only fun in it is Wonder Woman’s all too brief kick-ass fighting, let’s hope some other director does her movie and realizes that the audience would like to smile once every decade or so. Oh, and dream sequences make lousy motivators (almost as much as clouds being lousy villains), what’s wrong with reality doing that?

Have not seen it yet, but I know Captain America: Civil War will be a lot more fun. But Salon beat me to the punch and listed twelve Marvel superheroines who could have fixed its lack of women problem. How could they not have Carol Danver’s Captain Marvel? She’s military, she’s tough, she’s smart, she’s gonna have a Marvel movie, she’d have been perfect! And I’d have given a couple pints of blood if She-Hulk (tall, green, Raquel-Welch-esque amazon, and Bruce Banner’s cousin) could have gone toe-to-toe with Captain Marvel! Strength vs. strength! Super-jumping vs. flying! Hulk fists vs. energy blasts! Every fanboy’s dream: A SUPER-STRENGTH GIRL FIGHT!

P.S. She-Hulk is a lawyer, a superpower if there ever was one. A courtroom scene would have been neat: She-Hulk kicks butt in that vicious battlefield! Unless the other side hires Saul Goodman.

P.P.S. I won’t know which side Super Holly would be on until after I see the movie. She’s very independent, but she has a job on a superpowered peace corp: if she’s going to punch bad guys, she might as well get paid for it. She’d growl if Tony Stark/Iron Man hit on her, and she’d seriously crush on Steve Rogers/Captain America.

Puppies Force-Fed Tingly Vomit!

The rabid puppies tried to destroy the Hugo awards again by slate-stuffing the Hugo ballot box. But their mastermind made the mistake of slate-nominating erotica author Chuck Tingle’s book, Space Raptor Butt Invasion, thinking that it would drive the liberals in the science fiction community nuts.

It did not work out that way. Chuck Tingle did not like a sexist, racist troll trying to use him for evil. So Chuck hit three pitches out of the park by:

  • Writing a short story, Slammed in the Butt by My Hugo Award Nomination, where Chuck shows how seriously he takes the mastermind by having characters live, love, and have sex with airplanes. Yes, “with.”
  • Writing a series of tweets where he trolled “Voxman” and his “devilmen” henchmen. Click here to read them when no children are present, and when you are not drinking any milk (laughter makes that shoot out your nose).
  • And since Chuck keeps his true identity a secret, he asked Zoe Quinn, the game developer and anti-harassment activist whom gamergater trolls HATE, to accept the Hugo for him, should he win. Zoe is a Tingle fan, and she was delighted.

I am reminded of an old Lone Ranger cartoon, where the villain Mastermind cannot comprehend his defeat. A lawman explains it in simple terms at 6:11 into the video.

 

Book signings are a slow way to get rich.

A few thoughts on the May 7 book signing with the Fremont writers.

MagMat300Some people don’t read ebooks. A teacher came in and bought books from several writers, but not from me. She wanted a physical book in her hand. Penelope Anne Cole sold some children’s books that were very slim. I bought a couple. LESSON: Maybe CreateSpace can print my Super Bad Hair Day story bundle as a slim and cheap book; it would be a neat way to sell my short stories at book signings.

The Fremont Area Writers like my open mic readings. We read our stories out loud, and I threw myself into my part (as usual). One little boy was there also; he fidgeted at the start of my reading, but he was drawn in pretty quick. Kids like my readings too. LESSON 1: I need to make more audio files and put them onto the CDs (and my website); give more product to sell. LESSON 2: When I start my readings, I should say I am selling the story for a buck; that boy might have make me $1 richer if I had done that. LESSON 3: One writer said that he liked my reading, but in a couple places, he did not understand what I said. I must NEVER let my open mic diction get lazy!

There was not much traffic in the room where we were selling. I sold one CD, to another writer. The other writers did not fare a lot better. I was not disappointed, I was there to learn, and I got free pizza out of it (YUM!). LESSON: Nothing, except try again. I believe that in August, the Fremont writers will do another signing. I will see about prining little books and making more audio; maybe even sell little books with a CD. And I will remember, like I did today, to have fun. I enjoyed earning that one thin dollar.

LAST LESSONS: Get more stories out there, and FINISH WRITING MY NOVEL!!!

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May 7 book signing!

HOLLY COVER Reviz 3(This repeats my post from a few days ago. They say you should put on one more reminder the night before.)

Saturday, May 7, 2016, 11:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. at Round Table Pizza, 37480 Fremont Boulevard, Fremont, CA, the Fremont Area Writers will do a book signing. Have some pizza, and if you buy a book, get a free drink! Since I will sell my ebook for $1, that is a good deal. Check out the other writers, they are also worth your time.

I will sell CDs with mobi (Kindle), epub, and PDF copies of two Super Holly’s short stories: Super Bad Hair Day, and The Poet and the Supersplainer! Holly fights the evil and LOUD Harry Headbutt, and the poetic and deadly Karate Queen (while her boyfriend, The Intellectual, keeps telling her the most efficient ways to do her job). I’ll also sign a postcard with the ebook cover. I might set up my laptop to email the ebooks. Anything that works!

A quick Holly sketch

Holly-hypnotic homocide kristi batz zerga smallAt little comic cons, I have had artists do quick Holly sketches. Here’s one from Kristi “Batz” Zerga who drew it on her Hypnotic Homicide graphic novel. I showed her one of my Holly “eyes up here” cards, and said Holly has a bit of an attitude.

I think Kristi nailed Holly’s attitude toward Donald Trump. And anyone who votes for Donald Trump. And gamergaters. And Ayn Rand male protagonists. And mansplainers. And man-spreaders. And guys who tell others to “Man up,” thus insulting half the population of the planet on a regular basis. And the list goes on…

P.S. The suit is a bit tight. I always imagined Holly’s supersuit as a form-fitting sweatsuit, like Power Girl’s (without the window).

My First Book Signing: How???

Fremont_book_sale_sign_2016 MayThis Saturday, May 7, from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., the Fremont branch of the California Writers Club is having a sale and signing at Round Table Pizza, 37480 Fremont Boulevard, Fremont, CA. Come and get some pizza! And when you buy a book, you get a free drink!

Im my case, I will see how well I can sell my self-published eBook short story bundle: “Super Holly Hansson in Super Bad Hair Day, and The Poet and the Supersplainer!” How do I sell it when the other writers have nice, physical, papery books? To entice readers, I can:

  • Print a physical copy for readers to skim, with that wonderful Batton Lash cover of Super Holly in the barber chair, and my barber Lash breaking his scissors on Holly’s super-strong blonde hair.
  • Print a small poster of that wonderful Batton Last cover to entice readers.
  • Print postcards with that cover that I can sign for readers.
  • Do my open mic reading of Harry Headbutt hitting on Super Holly. I love doing that, Holly gets so MAD!

And when I have the reader DROOLING to buy my eBook:

  • The reader buys a copy on Amazon from their smart phone.
  • Or the reader gives me a dollar for a CD with a mobi, epub, and PDF copy of the story. (I will have to see how well that works.)
  • Or the reader gives me a dollar, and I will email him or her a mobi, epub, and PDF copy of the story. Either I bring my computer and email it there, or I take their email address and email them later.

Maybe I’ll become a few dollars richer, and be able to buy a drink with my profits.

P.S. Darn it, this book signing is the same day as Free Comic Book Day! Oh well. I have a few weeks of comic book backlog to read anyhow. And I like hanging with the Fremont writers.