Another lovable jerk, and not keeping my seat

zoran_01Yesterday at Cinequest was the flick Zoran my Idiot Nephew. A delight. Jerk as main character works again. And the kid is a perfect counterpart. A feel good movie that fits the definition.

I have noticed that when I see a Cinequest movie, I often change my seat. Once, twice, three times. I move when a big guy sits in front of me, when a guy/girl has to mumble little snuggly snookie-wookie stuff into the girl/guy’s ear, when an older lady (it is always an older lady) opens her purse that would be too large for an airline carry-on and fishes around for ten minutes then pulls out a small package made by Super Krackly Packaging Company and for ten more minutes opens the package with a KRINKLE CRACKLE KRUNCKLE KRINKLE RATTLE KRUNKLE KRINKLE and then extracts a candy about the size of an aspirin accompanied by five more minutes of those sound effects I just wrote and extracts another and another every two minutes for the next half hour all the while demonstarting why Super Krackly Packaging got its name, or the people who eat popcorn with a big wide-open-mouth CHOMP where the mouth acts as an echo chamber that threatens to loosen the nearest earthquake fault. Could be worse. The screen could be Smurfs.

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The 80s, a friending fiend, and chubby kids

Eternity_PosterAnother Cinequest recommendation: Eternity the Movie. Great sendup of the 80s music. Also got to see Lou’s Records in Encinitas, where I have bought a lot of CDs and DVDs. During Q&A, I asked how the actors could say those lines without cracking up. They said that they played their parts absolutely straight. Remember Leslie Nielsen in the Naked Gun movies?

Also saw Friended to Death. (also on facebook) I laughed a lot, and the movie had no dull moments. Making a movie with a conceited jerk as the main character is not easy, but in this case it WORKED. Lots of Facebook and texting jokes (LOL, ROFL, etc.). For instance, one character was adopted by a black lady. The main guy says, oh, you have a BLOM (black mom); a funny smothering mom. I met a producer and a lady actress from the flick (she played another crazy character in the movie, again proving that a very beautiful actress can be staggeringly funny) at a VIP meet-up. Which I got into for a few minutes. Don’t ask me how I did it.

Bite SIze, a documentary about childhood obesity, had me rooting for a young football player with anger issues. Not something I normally do, but boy did I want this kid to win.

Another note for Nothing in Los Angeles: I should have mentioned that one joke in the movie was a guy telling the scriptwriter that the script was not good “sonically.” Reminds me of a book publisher telling a guy in a critique group I was in that he needed “verbal fluency.” I do not believe that even  the book publisher knows what the heck that means.

A twisted short, a Woody Allen, and a loud bar


nothing-in-los-angeles

Cinemaquest highlights from yesterday:

The Sleeping Plot. In the Shorts 2 show, this 5 minute short has an adorably twisted little girl gathering cash in twisted ways for an evil goal. SO CUTE!!!!

Nothing in Los Angeles. An aspiring writer and witty dialogist takes a long time to finish his screenplay, and is involved with an older woman and a younger lady. Keep in mind that the director/writer, Alexander Tovar, completed this screenplay in one month. Wow. Alexander stars in the movie and plays a flawed but lovable teddy bear of an artist. The bits about LA guys shooting their really awesome movie are hilarious. This is a Woody Allen flick for the west coast. The promo pic for this flick is really cool, doncha think?

Went to a Maverick meet-up at 9:30. In a bar, of course. Talked to a couple filmmakers, had one hard cider, and then the music became LOUD. Um, why have a meet-up in a place where you have to nose-to-nose shout to talk to someone? How about a quieter and better ventilated coffee shop next time, like Caffe Frascati?

Cinequest. Ain’t it cool?

me-and-harryLast night, I met Harry Knowles of Ain’t it cool news. Very nice guy who loves good movies and hates bad ones (like Batman and Robin, Hollywood blamed him for its poor box office, and Harry gleefully said, “I’ll take that!”). He gave a talk and introduced a wonderful, Hitchcockian movie that he was promoting: Grand Piano. He said—and I wholehearted agreed—that this movie takes place in a theater, and should be seen in one. It has almost no marketing budget, so I say, SEE IT SEE IT SEE IT SEE IT!!!!!! Alfred H. would be proud.

Other Cinequest highlights so far: Hunting Elephants (Patrick Stewart is hilarious), and the animation shorts with Mr. Hublot (won the Oscar). And a short called The Fall, (Mads Sjøgård Pettersen · Oslo, Norway made it, go Scandinavians!) which had a perfectly edited ending.

Darn it, I should have given Harry a Holly business card. I need all the help I can get.

Holly and my new business cards

HOLLY EYES Reviz 2I print my own business cards. Since I hand out a lot more cards for my creative writing than technical writing, I put Holly on the latest version. She replaced a photo of an ocean sunset. (Holly loves ocean sunsets as much as I do.)

This’ll get attention! I will likely hand out cards at Cinequest in San Jose, CA, which started yesterday. It’s a great film festival, lots of small and big films.

The final cover art

HOLLY COVER Reviz 3Batton Lash sent the final version of the Super Bad Hair Day cover art. See? A thing of beauty!

We went back and forth a bit. Lash was always helpful and patient. Like with Holly’s trunk line and her wonderful up-arrow chest logo, which I discussed in previous posts.

LETTERING. An ebook cover will often be shrunk to thumbnail size. The main titles show up fine. I had thought that “Super Holly Hansson” should be blue, but Lash said “red pops.” I had him blow up my AUTHOR NAME for smaller sizes. But the word ballon text? My FIENDISHLY CLEVER PLAN is that people will want to read it, and thus click on the thumbnail to expand it, and thus be one step closer to BUYING MY STORY, MOOOOO HAHAHAHAHAHA!

infantino-batgirlTHE PURSE. I have a couple other art pieces Lash did. He had pointed me to the old Carmine Infantino Batgirl costume with a handbag on her hip. THAT is what I wanted for Holly! How else is she gonna carry her stuff? (Holly would have a writer’s keyboard and display, and comic books, and later, maybe some makeup.) Lash felt Holly’s purse should be yellow, “better than mixing it up with blue.” I agreed. (In the cover, Holly took the bag off before sitting down. My barber would have her do that.)

There’s a minor issue with image size, but I should be able to adjust it. Smashwords likes 1600 pixels wide. I wonder about that, the cover is never going to be that big in an ebook. I think. (The size issue is fixed. We think our emails were shrinking the files, so we used Dropbox.)

Now I have to format the story for Smashwords and Amazon. And then put it on the market. And see if anyone notices. Marketing tricks, here I come.

P.S. Thanks again, Batton Lash.